Why Why Why

So why do I tell you all that? Because God used those life events, to show me my need of Him. He used those events to show me areas in my life I had not given Him completely. He used those events to show my sinfulness. He used those events in my sanctification. He did not come just to justify me with His blood, but to sanctify me as well. He used those events for my good. Because I believe I was saved at the age of ten.

Why do I believe that? Because even as a child, I believed that God cleansed me from my sins. I believed that he took on that sin when he died on that cross, and rose again the third day. I believed I was a hopeless wretch full of sin at the age of ten. I knew my wretchedness. I believed that the only way I could be saved and a child of God was through the blood of Jesus Christ. I believe it because I was torn and full of a great disquiet. I was convicted of my sin. Every day that I tried to just run away, and give up, I was in mental distress. I wanted to please Him, but I did not know how. I cried out in anguish. The more I learn in Seminary, the more I have talked to pastors, the more I have talked to my professors, the more I am sure that I know the Lord. I know because He has not left me alone, and he has never let me go. I have reaped the consequences of my sins at times, and at others I have received miraculous grace. It is embarrassing to tell my story at times. It is painful to relive my story at other times, but I grow increasingly convinced that God wants me to tell my story.

I hear testimonies all the time of people who were saved and healed of certain things immediately. The thing I hear the most from friends and counselees, is that it was not so with them. They struggle with sin and they wonder why they struggle. They assumed (like me) that God would magically take away their struggles with sin and give them perfect obedience, and they would never want to sin anymore. They doubt their salvation, or think maybe something is wrong with them. The Bible says we will struggle with sin, that we must die daily, take up our crosses, and follow Him. But if we persevere and cry out to the Holy Spirit for supernatural help, God says we will have victory for His glory until He returns. I hope this encourages someone today to not give up hope that God is making them into a new creation.

1 Timothy 4:16 NIV
Watch your life and doctrine closely. Persevere in them, because if you do, you will save both yourself and your hearers.

1 John 3:6
6 No one who lives in him keeps on sinning. No one who continues to sin has either seen him or known him.

Hebrews 12:1 NIV
[God Disciplines His Sons] Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us.